I
am
now, probably for the
first time in my life, the person I have always wanted to be. Oh,
not my body! I sometime despair over my body ... the wrinkles,
the
baggy eyes, and the sagging butt.
And
often I am taken aback
by that old person that lives in my mirror, but I don't agonize over
those
things for long.
I
would
never trade my amazing
friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for less gray hair or a
flatter
belly. As I've aged, I've become more kind to myself, and less
critical
of myself. I've become my own friend. I don't chide myself
for eating that extra cookie, or for not making my bed, or for buying
that
silly cement gecko that I didn't need, but looks so avante garde on my
patio. I am entitled to overeat, to be messy, to be
extravagant.
I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before
they
understood the great freedom that comes with aging.
I
will
dance with myself to
those wonderful tunes of the 60's, and if I, at the same time, wish to
weep over a lost love ... I will.
I
will
walk the beach in a
swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body, and will dive into the
waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the
bikini set.
They,
too, will get old.
I
know I
am sometimes forgetful.
But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten ...and I
eventually
remember the important things.
Sure,
over the years my heart
has been broken. How can your heart not break when you lose a
loved
one, or when a child suffers, or even when a beloved pet gets hit by a
car? But broken hearts are what give us strength and
understanding
and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and
will ever know the joy of being imperfect.
I
am so
blessed to have lived
long enough to have my hair turn all different shades, even gray, and
to
have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my
face.
So
many
have never laughed,
and so many have died before their hair could turn silver.
I
can
say "no", and mean it.
I can say "yes", and mean it.
As
you
get older, it is easier
to be positive.
You
care
less about what other
people think.
I
don't
question myself anymore.
I've
even earned the right
to be wrong.
So,
I
will now make this statement,
I like getting old.
It
has
set me free.
I
am not
going to live forever,
but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could
have
been, or worrying about what will be. And I shall eat dessert
every
single day.
I
like
the person I have become.
Author:
Unknown